scarlet's walk (kisstheviolets) wrote,
scarlet's walk

guess who's back?

My computer is finally [somewhat] connected up with internet. Thankyou goes to Pat, my awesome housemate[!] It feels liberating to be able to use my own computer, and it's funny how being here takes me back to a time just 2 months ago when dreams were just starting to feel achievable. Opening up bookmarks in Explorer to discover pages I'd marked as important reference guides for things like moving van companies, information on accomodation, the main pages for the university I'm at. Finding lists of personal pages that I'd read regularly, that I now haven't checked for weeks. So much has happened since I've been away, yet in a crazy way, things stay the same too.

Today brings about it's own sense of beauty. We went to hire videos, and one of them is "The Virgin Suicides". I've been in a decidedly Lisbon mood of late; there's something about being up here, in this place, that inspires that in me. How, I'm not quite sure. Perhaps its something about this sense of calmness I seem to have these days, or maybe of sunlight and peace. It's something that I just can't describe.

Happiness isn't the right word for what I feel up here. Freedom is what it is. That's so much more powerful, amazing, and strong than I've had before, and nothing is going to take that away from me anymore.

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