scarlet's walk (kisstheviolets) wrote,
scarlet's walk
kisstheviolets

new job begins

whoa. i'm actually bored right now. this doesn't happen very often. i think i should be glad that i start work tomorrow; although no doubt by the end of the week i'll be regretting ever saying i was bored. i know there's stuff i should/ could be doing... but i lack the motivation to even think about what it is.

so, i'm scared to death (well, close to) of starting my new job tomorrow. what if they made a huge mistake in hiring me? what if i'm not the right person for the job after all? what if i'm nothing but a huge disappointment? what if i hate it? what if they hate me? so many what ifs... i really want this to go well. i really want to enjoy working there. i don't want to become another one of the masses who hates going to work, who spends life counting down until the weekend. i want to be happy in my new position, and do well at it. i want to be a success here, not a failure. i'm scared of failure; i wish i had russ's sense of confidence in myself.

i guess there's no point wondering all the "what ifs", because tomorrow i start, tomorrow i get my first taste of what it's like to work full-time. russ is adament that i'm beginning a career here, but i'm not sure if thinking about it like that is exciting, or just plain nerve-wracking. no, i'll think positively. this is exciting.

oh, but i really, really hope i'll like this job. i hope i'll do well at it... and i hope they'll like me too. tomorrow it begins.
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