money is the most evil thing. and i hate that i actually work and not just leach off others and somehow come out at a loss. but there is a satisfaction in working (even if this isn't my ideal job) and i know that there is no way i could go back to being a full-time student again. i hate that everything revolves around money. i feel a bit disillusioned today. also i'm mad because a $50 cheque from an ebay customer couldn't be cashed after all. that was $50 that was going to pay for my health insurance for the next 2 months; now i'm not sure what to do. damn you, international buyers who don't read my disclaimer that i'll only accept paypal for overseas customers before bidding. it's all too much of a headache and i just don't want to think about it anymore. any of it.

i wish there were some good ways of making money that don't require an initial financial outlay at the start. i need to get to to work promoting the distro; not that it was ever intended to be money-making, but it'd be nice if it could even partly support itself. and you know, there's no fucking pride in taking handouts and i like to actually use my brains to earn money; but goodness it would be nice to stop worrying for a change.

(and miss sarah/sparkleoflife - don't you dare think i was referring to you in any of that. god knows that being a mother is THE hardest job in the world, and i'm certainly not begrudging anyone deserving like that. and i know that a lot of you are looking for work, and that certainly isn't any fun at all. it just bugs me when people don't make any effort and just complain about their situations. you know, it wasn't a whole lot of fun working a 20-30hr a week job at the same time as being at uni full-time, but i still did it.

i am really just sick of people who whinge and play the fucking victim all the time. but i'm sure you're going to hate me for being the bitch; perhaps i just have an attitude problem today.)